When I interact with the world, people see (and I know this because I get told rather frequently ... THANK YOU all!) a vibrant, smiling, positive, go-getting person. Well, most people do, anyhow.When I come home, or interact with those who know me better, they also see someone who gets upset, frustrated and cries when she feels overwhelmed by financial pressures, wrongdoings and stressful situations. I was reading SUCCESS magazine last night, after my uplifting dance class and before falling asleep while trying to avoid thinking about all the pressing issues I’m dealing with lately. On the one hand, some of the authors writing about positivism and getting ahead in tough times sound really commonsensical. On the other hand, I feel they convey (and I've been wondering if I do too sometimes) that it is something to be ashamed of to have moments of self-doubt, of desperation and of wanting to hang out in your PJs all day and let the world do its own thing while you feel sorry for yourself.
I am the author of quite a few self-help books, and it feels ironic that I need help myself at times. But, I do go and find it, mind you! Every single day: in books, motivational CDs, pursuing my passions, listening to my children and even searching within my soul.
I am human, and my own Wonder Woman cape snags at times. I also feel hurt, alone, scared, sad and hopeless on occasion (or more than on occasion). And I’ve realized it’s ok! If I did not experience those quiet moments of desperation, I would not enjoy the fun times, the high times, and the thrill of bouncing back, dusting myself off and getting back to the task of motivating myself and others by example.
Sometimes my body and soul need to retire in solitude and feel the pain until it hurts so much that it becomes unbearable unless I do something about it. It feels like using a bow and arrow ... In order to propel the arrow forward, you have to pull it back. If you want to skate uphill, you must first skate downhill really fast, to gain momentum, and then you can take on that next slope. Hey, I’ve broken my tailbone a couple times skating, and I have strapped those rollerblades on again …
If you are feeling down and desperate, don’t beat yourself up about it. Just learn from it, know others out there, to include myself, are putting on their game face on a daily basis and that’s fine. The good thing is ... when you do it often enough, smiling and a positive attitude do become a lifestyle, and you will find ways to get back on your feet faster and faster after every fall!
Come on, we can do this!
Hear!...hear!
ReplyDeleteI always enjoy reading your blog!
Can really relate with your feelings, the rollercoaster is a very good description :- ) There are only a select few I ever confide in when I am down, some folks don’t understand and can just make us more miserable (lol…must laugh or would cry..lol)
You are so right, there is more right about having down feelings, than not. It only becomes a problem when we dwell on them continuously. If we did not have these feelings we would not be human. We are healthy when we feel all we can feel. Learning to put those “feeling sorry for ourselves”, “anxious”, etc type feelings, into positive action is the key. You are a shinning example of this Lorraine & when you feel differently I have a couple of good ears if you ever need them :- )
Thank you, Marla, you are a doll. I think we have a similar view of life ...
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