Successful Friendships

Would you like to improve the quality of your friendships and if so, what steps could you take towards that goal? Don’t focus on changing the other person in order to improve your relationship with them because that’s impossible. 

We cannot control other people, places and things and we can only change our attitudes and ourselves. This is often enough to improve our interactions with others, but sometimes we simply evolve, some friends fall behind and then the only possible change is to end the relationship.

Emotional vampires are very capable of draining you of joy and depleting your energy reserves. The best thing you can do is avoid them, of course. We shouldn’t put our happiness in the hands of others, but we can surround ourselves with proactive, positive people who help us improve. Attitudes are contagious, so why not catch a positive one?

Friendships should be enriching. If every time you talk to a certain friend or acquaintance you feel you need to protect yourself and you end up in a bad mood or exhausted after the interaction, reevaluate the friendship.

It´s not a matter of doing away with all your friendships because they´re not perfect. In fact, few are, if any! But realize that your level of happiness usually reflects the quality of your best relationship. And if the best one is not so good, you’re probably not as happy as you deserve to be.

To see my latest book in Spanish, Volver a Empezar, (Starting over) on relationships, click here.

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www.lorrainecladish.com

Keep an Open Heart

I look around at my peers and see a lot of jaded faces, marked by frowns and tired eyes. I hear both men and women say that members of the opposite sex are untrustworthy. Many have given up completely on love, on companionship, on friendship, on intimacy ... on having it all, because of how things worked out for them in the past. Because they suffered, they do not want to risk being happy. Does that really make sense?

It may seem trite, but what we focus on becomes the truth for us, whether it be positive or negative. Why not go for the positive? I have also come to realize that we tend to see in others a reflection of ourselves.

One of the reasons I feel I get along so well with younger people is because, for the most part, they are still dreamers and idealists, as am I ...

In love as well as in life, we cannot base the future always on the past. That is not to say we should not or could not, learn from our mistakes, of course. It does mean that even if someone has betrayed us in the past, the only one we are harming by believing that everyone will betray us in the future, is ourselves. We are also depriving others of our beauty, of our companionship and our love.

Keep an open heart and fill it with your own love, as only by loving oneself can one give to others and be ready to receive love and friendship compounded. Be generous, trusting and joyful and that is what you will attract.

When the right person comes, you will know - there will be a gut feeling; no ifs and buts, no rules. Trust your gut and don´t let anyone tell you otherwise.

www.lorrainecladish.com/

Successful friendships

I can count my best friends with just a few fingers, but they are the ones who have been there for the long haul, and me for them. We have shared good times, bad times, arguments, make-up hugs, laughs and tears. We have been separated in time and distance and reunited more than once. 

Over the years we have become pillars in one another's lives, and every time we meet up again in person we take up exactly from where we left off. Not one moment of awkwardness or a what if.

In order to be successful in business, professionally, creatively and in other relationships, it is vital to have a solid network of friends. 

This creates balance, support and perspective and helps us keep on track when we temporarily go adrift. My best friends are those who I feel like calling immediately when I have great news to tell or sad news to share. And when others do the same with me, I feel complemented and reciprocated.

No matter what is going on in our lives, successful friendships will always fuel the other areas of our lives. Don't forget to nurture them. 

www.lorrainecladish.com